Sooooooooooo I was at work tonight and some kid came in asking for help. Apparantly a goose had flown into some power lines, then fallen and was hit by a car, and hobbled off the road onto Pizza Hut property. It was alive but injured. I went ahead and called dispatch and let them know what had happened and they sent an officer out.
The situation amused me. I went out to check on the goose and the emo kids a couple of times. Being emo kids, at least one of them was bawling. They also purchased one single breadstick and tried to feed it to the injured goose. They called their emo friends, who came and also sat outside by the side of the road with their little goose friend. One of the scuzzier looking guys came inside and pawed through our phone book trying to find a phone number that might have something to do with someone who would want to come pick up an injured goose. I told him I'd already called dispatch and an officer was on the way. He said, "Well......instead of calling the police............why don't we try and call..........someone............who................animals?" I let him look for whatever that meant. He didn't find anything.
The officer arrived, along with some guy with a pickup truck and a giant birdcage. He wrangled the bird (which consisted of gently covering it with a blanket and picking it up) and put it in the cage, assuring the emo kids that it was going to a happy place with a big yard and lots of other bird friends to play with (NO JOKE). I thought this sounded strangely like what happens to most people's dogs when they are too young to understand death. I didn't mention this to the tear-stained emo kids, however. The girl who had been crying the hardest looked very happy to hear this news. She then went and scratched the ears of the pit bull sitting in the front of the pickup truck.
Now, don't get me wrong, I did care about the injured bird and was glad to do what I could to help it out, but......
Seriously, crying on the side of the road about a bird that's a little shook up? Buying breadsticks to try and feed a bird who is too shaken to eat? Calling all your friends? Checking the yellow pages for People Who Save Birds Or Something?
Oh, and after it was all over, bird and emo kids and cops gone, someone called the store to tell us there was a goose on the side of the road and to call 902-DUCK to get it taken care of. A little late, but now I know who to call to handle my fowl problems.
5 comments:
What a waste. You could have invented a new topping.
That's funny. I can imagine those kids trying to get it to eat a breadstick.
Thank you for writing that. I think it would be a perfect scene in my Great American Novel.
I think the emo kid was trying to find animal control, but I'm pretty sure that when you call the police about problems like that they contact animal control.
Oh, and emo kids are ridiculous and not very smart. I thought that maybe the fad was starting to disappear but apparently you just crushed that dream.
the emo children typically cannot control their emotions, therefore they are known to cry at the drop of a needle...or in this case fowl. (haha)
One time during a summer a friend of mine and I were quite hungry and we noticed lots of geese around. One of them fell victim and we cooked him up. Some Panamanian ate most of it while we were still cooking the rest and this made us mad. It was likely our fault for cooking the feast on a sidewalk outside of a dorm. This story brings the memory back to me, another wasted meal...
that was one of those wild animals that meredith and i didn't get to sample.
we were fairly perturbed about it.
;)
Post a Comment